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Video channel youtube:http://www.youtube.com/user/whatevergal101/featured Dear Parents. Jasmine was in a relationship with a dirty homeless boy named Aladdin. Snow White lived alone with 7 men. Pinnochio was a liar. Robin Hood was a thief. Tarzan walked around without clothes on. A stranger kissed sleeping beauty and she married him. Cinderella lied and snuck out at night to attend a party. You can't blame us. We were taught to rebel since a young age. In the end we only regret chances we didnt take.The relationships we were scared to have and the decisions we waited to long to make there comes a time in your life when you realise who matters, who doesnt, who never did and who always will. i don't care if you're black, white, straight, bisexual, gay, lesbian, short, tall, fat, skinny, rich or poor. If you're nice to me, I'll be nice to you. Simple as that. - Eminem Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for." -Bob Marley Our parents wonder why we turn out like this ? - Cinderella went to parties all night - Snow white slept for years - Prince charming was married to like 5 girls - Jasmine sneeked out - Ariel didn't wear a shirt - Belle lied and they wonder ? Yes I do all these post it on things like I did at 10. It was fun so :P to everyone out there who thinks it's old school and immature maybe I like that! We all need some immaturity and childishness in our lives. (¸.•´ (¸.•´ ¸.•´¨) ¸.•¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•´ c a n c e r • i s n ' t • f a i r Pass the ribbon around if you know someone who's died from, survived, or is living with cancer. (\_/) (='.'=) This is Bunny. Copy and paste bunny into your (")_(") proflie to help him gain world domination. (.)'(.) (='.'=)This is Bunny's brother. Put him on your profile to help (")_(")him achieve WorldDomination. 'If You's: Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! 98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile. If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile. If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile! If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile. If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile. If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile. If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile If you have embarrasing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile. Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile You stare because im different...I stare because you're all the same. Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you are a nerd and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile 92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off. For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you laugh uncontrollably at your own jokes. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you laugh when nothing's funny.Crazy is when you crack up if someone says "Oatmeal!". Crazy is when you forget what you're saying in the middle of a sentence. Crazy is when you take the time to write down stuff like this and memorize it. Crazy is when your are going through this as a checklist. Crazy is when you quote Charlie the Unicorn at random moments. Crazy is when you're crazy. Crazy is when start talking nonsense everyday during gym. Crazy is when you convince your friends you're 'amazing' because you can't stop laughing even when nothing is funny. And then all of you convince the nearest adult that you're having a breakdown. Crazy is when you trip up the stairs, and laugh all the way back down them. Crazy is when it is last day of school you scream and run around in circles. Crazy is when you get drunk on air and laugh during the saddest part of the move. Crazy is when you pick up a stick and run around screaming, "I'm a pixie!". Crazy is when you eat your friend's chocolate bar and tell them that the Purple Sandwich Monster did it. Crazy is when you hug people who hate being hugged every two minutes. Crazy is when after you watch a movie, you search it on Wikipedia. Crazy is the friends in your head. Crazy is when you talk to yourself then talk to yourself about talking to yourself. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list! 93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that’s never been asked out. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Harry Potter, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone. Try not to Cry Mommy ... Johnny brought a gun to school, He told his friends that it was cool, And when he pulled the trigger back, It shot with a great, huge crack. Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told, I went to school, got straight A's, and I even got the gold! When I went to school that day, I never said goodbye, I'm sorry that I had to go, but Mommy, please don't cry. When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another, And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother. Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much, And please tell Zack, my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush. And tell my sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear, sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now, And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best, Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest. Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class, And never to forget this, and please don't let this pass. Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one though, deserves this, But Mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss. And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try, I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry. Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest, But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest. When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could, Please listen to me if you would, I wanted to go with college, I wanted to try things that were new, I guess I'm not going with Daddy, on that trip to the new zoo. I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live. But Mommy, I must go now, the time is getting late, Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel our date. I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know it's true, And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you." Please if you would, Don't smash this on the ground. If you pass this on, Maybe people will cry, Just keep this in your heart, For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".Now you have a choice, to repost this as Try Not To Cry. Weird instructions: Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods... On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!) On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!) On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?) On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's 'just' a suggestion!) On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! you lose!) On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure? Let's experiment.) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?) On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.) On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!) On deoderant: For External Use Only (Too bad, it looked like a nice lollipop) THIS IS 29 WAYS 2 ANNOY UR PARENTS!! : 1.follow them around the house everywhere. 2. Moo when they say your name. 3. Pretend to have amnesia. 4. Say everything backwards. 5. Run into walls. 6. Say that wearing clothes is against your religion. 7. Go into their room at 4 in the morning and say "Good Morning Sunshine!" 8. Snort loudly when you laugh and then laugh harder. 9. Say all of the words in a film. 10. Pluck someone's hair out and yell "DNA!!" 11. Wear a sticker that says "I'm a retard!" 12. Talk to a pen. 13. Have 20 imaginary friends that you talk to ALL the time. 14. Try and climb the wall. 15. In public yell "NO MUM I WILL NOT SNOG YOU!!" 16. Put pegs on your nose and eyes. 17. Switch the light button on and off for awhile. Then say "Oh...I get it!" 18. Eat your hair. 19. Hold their hand and whisper to them "I see dead people." 20. When you shower or bath yell "I'm drowning!!" 21. At everything they say yell "LIAR!!" 22. Pretend to be a phone. 23. Try to swim in the floor. 24. Tap on their door all night 25. wear a t-shirt pointing at one of your parents saying i'm with stupid 26. In a Supermarket yell @ everything you c "I WANT THAT, CAN I HAVE IT!" 27. After everything they say, say "yeah, but, no, but, yeah, but no!" 28. claim you have been abducted by aliens b4 and tell all their friends! 29. have a tantrum in the middle of the supermarket and sit cross legged, arms folded in the middle of the floor so that ppl have to walk round u! Things To Remember: "Everything Will Be Okay in the End. If It's Not Okay, It's Not the End." Anonymous "When all is said and done, more is said than done", Aesop. Beat the 5 o'clock rush - Leave work at noon. Don't drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink. You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. Why are so many viruses aimed at windows ? It crashes just fine on its own! The question of whether computers can think is like the question of whether submarines can swim. A day without sunshine is called night. The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources. It isn't homework unless it's due tomorrow. If the grass is greener on the other side, you can bet the water bill is higher. Advice is what people ask for when they know the answer but wish they didn't This question below was found on alittleinsane963's page, so even though i didn't ask thanks for it, and hope you don't mind i've copied it for mine: Question: Why is it that our favorite scenes/episodes are the ones that show your favorite character in their weakest state? Why is Cinderella a fairy tale? Any idiot can lose a shoe! My Imaginary Friend thinks you have mental problems, and trust me, she would know! "OMGWTF!" is NOT a spell... trust me, I've tried. A friend will bail you out of jail, but a best friend will be sitting in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS AWESOME , LETS DO IT AGAIN!!" A friend will help you up when you fall, but a best friend will point, laugh, and draw more attention to the fact that you fell. A friend will split their lunch with you if you forgot yours, but a best friend will guard their food, stick out their tongue, and say, "You should have brought your own lunch, stupid! Now back off mine!" A friend will ask before eating something at your house, but a best friend will come into your house, barely say hello, and head straight to your fridge. A friend will ring your doorbell and wait patiently, but a best friend will pound on your door incessantly until you open it fifteen seconds later and say, "This situation could have been avoided if you had simply left your door unlocked!" A friend will use the common, "I think that shirt would look nice with jeans," suggestion, but a best friend will say, "YOU IDIOT! Why are you wearing a skirt with that shirt?!" and will then proceed to tear your closet apart looking for the jeans that are in your dresser drawer, which she, of course, already knew. She will then say, "Your room looks like crap. Clean up much?" A friend will ask if they can show you a song and will then pull it up on youtube, but a best friend will buy it and transfer it to your iPod and then tell you to listen to it or suffer their extreme displeasure. A friend will agree to a game of cards, but a best friend will agree, then proceed to suggest 52-pickup and begin the game before you agree. A friend will tell you to ignore the mean girls calling you names, but a best friend will keep the insults coming until a teacher walks down the hall, and will then drag you around the corner to listen as the mean girls get chewed out. A friend will wake you up if you fall asleep in class, but a best friend will raise their hand and shout out across the whole room to the teacher that you are drooling on their book. A friend will let you sleep in as late as you want after you fall asleep at four, but a best friend will wake you up half an hour later simply because they drank too much coffee and can't sleep and feel you should share their punishment. A friend will stay on the phone with you as long as you need to talk, but a best friend will stay on the phone until they arrive at your house and will then stay there until you kick them out four days later when you are completely recovered. A friend will laugh about a prank a teacher pulled on you, but a best friend will help you plot and carry out your revenge while laughing. I know I'm not perfect. I know I'm a geek, in many different ways. I know I listen to "weird" bands. I know I like to read. I know I like school, even the teachers. BUT: I know I have true friends. I know I'm loved. I know who I love. I know what I love. I know I can overcome put-downs. I know who I am. Anything else you'd like to throw at me? Month One Hi Mommy! I am only 3/4 of an inch long, but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it, I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby. Month Two Mommy, today I learned how to suck my thumb! If you could see me you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here. Month Three You know what Mommy? I'm a boy!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too. I cry with you even though you can't hear me. Month Four Mommy, My hair is starting to grow! It is very short and fine, but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too. Month Five You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby! I think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion? Month Six I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me! Month Seven Mommy I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. He is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me Mommy? Every Abortion Is Just: One more heart that was stopped. Two more eyes that will never see. Two more hands that will never touch. Two more legs that will never run. One more mouth that will never speak. 92 of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 laughing your butt off. If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this,too. If you ever wanted to slap someone, copy and paste. If you haven't died yet, well guess what? copy and paste this in your profile. If you get good grades and yet still know nothing, copy/paste onto profile If you hear voices of the characters in your head, copy/paste onto profile If you're crazy, copy/paste onto profile. If you don't think that everything Oprah says is true and you don't watch her religiously then copy/paste onto profile and add your name to the list. If you easily finish one novel a day, copy/paste onto profile If you've ever read past two in the morning, copy/paste onto profile. If you love rain, copy/paste onto profile. Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy/paste onto profile. 93 of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?" copy/paste onto profile. If you have your own little world, copy/paste onto profile. If you've reread TWILIGHT over four times ... copy/paste onto profile. If you have ever seen a movie or show so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do so at random moments, post on profile. If several inanimate objects hate you post this on profile. MURPHY'S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS: 1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 2. He who laughs last thinks slowest. 3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. 4. Those that live by the sword get shot by those who don't. 5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. 6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 change of getting something right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong. 7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog. 8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. 9. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. 11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries. 12. A shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room. 13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. 14. When you go to court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. Funny bumper stickers We are the people our parents warned us about. God wants spiritual fruits, not religious nuts. Don't Follow me I am LOST!! Women are born leaders, LOOK you are following one now! Did you just fart or did you always smell that way? It could be worse. What if sex was fattening? Life's a *****, and then you die. Graduate quickly, millions on welfare depend on you. Bill Clinton 99 Fact Free Yesterday I knew nothing, today I know that. The good thing about small cars is that you can fit twice as many into a traffic jam. Doctor's say I have a multiple personality, but we don't agree with that. If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you. Illiterate? Write for free help. Take me drunk, I'm home. Life is like a straw, it sucks. Don't delay, paint today I drive like this to piss you off! "It is Mind over Matter... If you ain't go no mind... It don't Matter" I may be slow but I'm in front of you. S uicide is away of telling God, You can't fire me I quit!! You have to be really secure to be seen in that car. I'm wondering if you have any horns with goofy songs? DANGER: I drive like you do! Kids in the backseat cause accidents... accidents in the backseat cause kids. Please don't hit me I'm a pedestrian trapped in a car. S.A.S.R. - Speeders Against Ski Racks If it's tourist season, does that mean we can shoot them? Jesus loves you, but everyone else still thinks your an ass hole. I don't drive fast I fly low If you don't like the way I drive, get off the sidewalk! Your child may be an honor student, but you're still an idiot. If you can read this you're in range. The number of people staring at you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your actions. It's not the size of the boat that matters, it's the motion in the ocean. Save the planet recycle an environmentalist. Just because your not paranoid doesn't mean their not out to get you. Study long study wrong. Blow your nose, your horn works fine. My karma ran over my dogma. I tried being normal once. . .I didn't like it. I'm not really a driver I just play one on TV. Life may suck, but it beats the alternative. Minds are like parachutes--they only function when open. Why did God give beauty queens one more brain cell than horses? So they wouldn't **** on stage. Horn Broken...Watch For Finger. Everything Is Somewhere. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not sure... I love cats...they taste just like chicken. I Wish I Was Barbie. That ***** has EVERYTHING. CAUTION I BRAKE FOR HOOKERS. If it isn't broken...fix it until it is! Keep America clean...swallow your beer cans. I was an atheist until I realized I was GOD. Smile...show off your teeth. Clean up America. Shoot a redneck! I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't stick my head that far up my ass. House guarded by a shotgun 3 nights a week. You guess which? I left the womb for this I can go from zero to ***** in 2.2 seconds. T he more I learn, the less I understand. I'm not littering... I'm donating to the earth. If you can read this, I am parked. I got this car for my wife...not a bad trade. All generalizations are false. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. I get enough exercise just pushing my luck! Sometimes I wake up grumpy, Other times I let her sleep!! I took an IQ test and the results were negative When there's a will, I want to be in it! Learn from your parents mistakes - use birth control! Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW! T ell me to 'Stuff It' - I'm a taxidermist Live long enough to be a problem to your kids. I'm objective, I object to everything. If you didn't get caught, did you really do it? Life is a terminal disease. Nothing is illegal until you get caught. Do not believe in miracles - rely on them. Driver carries less than IN AMMUNITION In God we trust, all others must pay cash. Believe in Darwin, cancer cures smoking. Remember when getting high meant swinging at the playground The worst thing you could get from boys was cooties Mom was your hero and dad was the boy you were going to marry Your worst enemies were your siblings Race issues were who ran the fastest War was a card game The only drug you knew of was cough medicine Wearing skirts didnt mean you were a slut The only thing you smoked was the tires on your bike The only thing that hurt was skinned knees The only things that can get broken were your toys Goodbyes only meant till tomorrow Life was simple and care free, But what i remember the most was actually wanting to grow up 1. I’m smiling, that alone should scare you 2. Well, Aren’t we just a ray of ******* sunshine 3. Not the brightest crayon in the box now are we? 4. If we are what we eat, then I’m fast cheap and easy 5. If we are what we eat then why aren’t I 97 fat free? 6. Even my shrink says it’s all your ******* fault 7. Did you eat a bowl of stupid for breakfast? 8. Easy there Mr Testosterone, you can easily be replaced by a zucchini 9. Can’t sleep, clowns will eat me 10. Damn right I’m good in bed I can sleep for days 11. And your ******** opinion would be? 12. Admitting you’re an ******* is the first step 13. Rest assured, nobody gives a **** what you think 14. I want it all and I want it delivered by cute naked men 15. A hard on doesn’t count as personal growth 16. A bit pissy today? 17. Please feel free to shut the **** up 18. Being a crabby ***** is part of my charm 19. I understand, I just don’t care 20. Life’s a ***** and so am I 21. ***** is the new black 22. I do whatever the little voices tell me to do 23. For a good time, call somebody else 24. Whoop-dee ******** do! 25. Aren’t we just a little freak of nature 26. You say I’m a ***** like it’s a bad thing 27. Back to your bridge you evil troll, you have no powers here 28. Don’t make me go psycho-***** on your annoying ass 29. A clean house is a sign of a wasted life 30. You suck big time 31. I see you’re playing stupid again, it looks like you are winning too 32. If only men were as satisfying as chocolate 33. A few clowns short of a circus, aren’t we 34. Behind every great woman is a whiny bastard 35. It’s better to have loved and lost than to live with the psycho for the rest of your life 36. I don’t know... google it 37. They say that hard work never hurt anyone, but why take the risk 38. Click your heels together 3 times and go **** yourself 39. I smoke, ******* deal with it 40. Do they ever shut upon your planet? 41. Notice, sexual harassment in this area will not be reported. However it will be graded 42. If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen 43. I’m sorry, my fault. I forgot you were an idiot 44. I’ve noticed that all my problems are caused by other people 45. I’m sorry, you must have mistaken me for someone who gives a **** 46. Please take a number and stick it up your ass 47. Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me 48. Whatever 49. Warning PMS, for your own safety -shut up and back away slowly 50. Oops, I ruined my parents life 51. We are the people our parents warned us about 52. Hello, pot to kettle 53. The end is nigh 54. Trust me, I’m a professional 55. Pink sheep of the family 56. A bird in the hand is worth a trip to the bush 57. Jesus is coming, quick – look busy 58. I gave myself to Jesus and now he never calls 59. So much to do, so few people to do it for me 60. You say tuh-mey-toh, I say get ****** 61. Jesus loves you but I’m his favourite 62. Jesus loves you but the rest of us think you’re an ******* 63. I see dumb people 64. I’m still hot, it just comes in flashes now 65. The more I drink, the better you look 66. You’re just jealous because the voices are talking to me 67. The worst parent in the world allegedly 68. There must be more to managing than giving vague directions and punishing people for not reading my mind 69. I don’t need your attitude I have my own 70. Warning, I have an attitude and know how to use it 71. I tried to see things from your point of view but I couldn’t get my head that far up my ass 72. Am I dead yet? 73. Kill me now 74. Try thinking with your big head for a change 75. Sometimes it’s hard to see the forest for the freaks 76. Like what you see? ... call 1800U-wish 77. My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems 78. Ask me about my ability to annoy complete strangers 79. Actually yes, it is all about me 80. Save the wildlife, throw a party 81. Oh ****, I forgot to have children 82. Life is uncertain, eat dessert first 83. I’ll give you a hint...money 84. Never underestimate the power of an extremely pissed off woman 85. There’s no manslaughter without laughter 86. Silence is golden, duct tape is silver 87. Warning, I’m not a morning person 88. Do I look like a ******* people person? 89. One French fry short of a happy meal now aren’t we 90. Somebody needs a happy meal 91. I’m high maintenance, I think you’ve got to be 92. Don’t tell me what kind of day to have 93. Queen of ******* everything 94. Chaos, panic, disorder... my work here is done 95. Amazingly enough, I don’t give a **** 96. How many drinks? 97. I may be easy, but I’m not cheap 98. Daggy is the new black 99. Chicks rule, boys make good pets 100. I judge you when you use poor grammer 101. Disney gave me false expectations 102. Ask me what I think about stupid questions 103. My philosophy is that anything worth doing is too hard 104. Not all men are annoying, some are dead 105. You look like ****, is that in style now? 106. Remember, men are friends not food 107. Stop my subscription, I’ve had enough of your issues 108. Wait, I’m trying to imagine you with personality 109. It’s all fun and games till someone takes out an eye, then it’s hilarious 110. What part of **** off, do you not understand Girl: Slow down, Im scared. Guy: No, this is fun. Girl: No it's not. Please it's too scary! Guy: Then tell me you love me. Girl: Fine I love you. Slow down! Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. Girl : hugs him Guy: Can you take my helmet off and put it on yourself? It's bugging me. Girl: Alright, now slow down Guy: I love you babe (in the paper the next day): A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of brake failure. Two people were on it, but only 1 had survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his brakes broke, but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him and felt her hug one last time, then he had her wear his helmet so that she would live even though it meant that he would die. are you a person who can love your dearest this deep? Try not to Cry Mommy ... Johnny brought a gun to school, He told his friends that it was cool, And when he pulled the trigger back, It shot with a great, huge crack. Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told, I went to school, got straight A's, and I even got the gold! When I went to school that day, I never said goodbye, I'm sorry that I had to go, but Mommy, please don't cry. When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another, And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother. Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much, And please tell Zack, my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush. And tell my sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear, sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now, And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best, Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest. Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class, And never to forget this, and please don't let this pass. Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one though, deserves this, But Mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss. And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try, I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry. Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest, But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest. When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could, Please listen to me if you would, I wanted to go with college, I wanted to try things that were new, I guess I'm not going with Daddy, on that trip to the new zoo. I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live. But Mommy, I must go now, the time is getting late, Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel our date. I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know it's true, And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you." Please if you would, Don't smash this on the ground. If you pass this on, Maybe people will cry, Just keep this in your heart, For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye". For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you laugh uncontrollably at your own jokes. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you laugh when nothing's funny.Crazy is when you crack up if someone says "Oatmeal!". Crazy is when you forget what you're saying in the middle of a sentence. Crazy is when you take the time to write down stuff like this and memorize it. Crazy is when your are going through this as a checklist. Crazy is when you quote Charlie the Unicorn at random moments. Crazy is when you're crazy. Crazy is when start talking nonsense everyday during gym. Crazy is when you convince your friends you're 'amazing' because you can't stop laughing even when nothing is funny. And then all of you convince the nearest adult that you're having a breakdown. Crazy is when you trip up the stairs, and laugh all the way back down them. Crazy is when it is last day of school you scream and run around in circles. Crazy is when you get drunk on air and laugh during the saddest part of the move. Crazy is when you pick up a stick and run around screaming, "I'm a pixie!". Crazy is when you eat your friend's chocolate bar and tell them that the Purple Sandwich Monster did it. Crazy is when you hug people who hate being hugged every two minutes. Crazy is when after you watch a movie, you search it on Wikipedia. Crazy is the friends in your head. Crazy is when you talk to yourself then talk to yourself about talking to yourself. My name is Sarah I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me. I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong Or else I'm locked up All the day long. When I awake I'm all alone The house is dark My folks aren't home When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice, So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight. Don't make a sound! I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar. I hear him curse My name he calls I press myself Against the wall I try and hide From his evil eyes I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words, He says its my fault That he suffers at work. He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more, I finally get free And I run for the door. He's already locked it And I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall. I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken. "I'm sorry!", I scream But its now much too late His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate The hurt and the pain Again and again Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door, While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor My name is Sarah And I am but three, Tonight my daddy Murdered me. Repost this if you are against child abuse. Quotes "It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip 'em the bird." "If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight."- George Gobel "USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population." David Letterman. "If at first you don't succeed, Cheat, repeat until caught, then lie." "When every thing's coming your way, your in the wrong lane." "Never test the depth of water with both feet." "Randomness is the base to all conversations." A wise man once said: "There are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count and those who can't..." "One night, I was lying in my bed, looking at the stars, and wondering, 'Where the heck is my roof?'" "Neither Fate, nor Destiny can tell you what to do, it is your own Free Will that does." "When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and make life wonder how you did it." "You can only be a kid once. But you can be immature forever." "Don't tell me the sky's the limit, when there's footprints on the moon." "Whoever said 'Nothing is impossible' has obviously never tried to slam a revolving door." "Ok Einstein, so what's the speed of dark?" "I'm as sharp as a marble!"
Latest page update: Aug 27 2012, 5:07 AM EDT
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